Click here to show form Reflections by Thea: Barbara Anne Horton Whitten Parrish

Total Pageviews

Saturday, June 8, 2013

Barbara Anne Horton Whitten Parrish

... was an exceptional woman.

She gobbled up current events, enthusiastically exercising her right to vote and volunteering her time to the political process, even before the Women's Movement made it chic to do so. She championed the underdog, encouraging her children towards compassion and awareness of those who were suffering. Upon learning of the misfortune of a former classmate (with whom she had lost contact years before), she rallied the friend's church to support and care for her. She tracked down a disadvantaged family she learned of on the news, and dug into her own pocket to aid them at Christmastime. But perhaps her most significant gift to the world was promoting peace in her own family.

If charity begins at home, doesn't it stand to reason that harmony does as well?

Don't misunderstand. Barbara had a fiery temper, but that temper was tempered by an equally strong and protective love for her family. While it would be dishonest to say her emotional side didn't get her into trouble with the aforementioned family (on more than one occasion), it would be equally unfair to imply that it didn't influence the spirit and grit of said family, in perpetuity. While Barbara has been gone from this earth for over ten years, the same moxie that enabled her to single parent her first child for 11 years came to bear when one of her four daughters found herself in the role of solo parent decades later. The same outrage that fueled her battles with educational authorities who mistreated her children spurred her grandson to stand up for a bullied classmate years down the line.

I guess the generation gap isn't as wide as some may think.

Rifts that took place between Barbara and her sisters engendered her passionate appeals to her own children, begging them always to "be friends with each other." Recognizing that the example of estrangement in her family of origin could well be contagious, Barbara pleaded with her children to learn from it, not by it. Consequently, when it came time to care for ailing parents and ultimately to share their estate, Barbara's daughters cooperated instead of contesting (to the point where the daughter who was most in need received, with the full support of the others, a larger share of the assets).

In this day and age of greed and looking out for Number One? Really?

Characteristically, Barbara chose the high road when given the opportunity to mend relations with her sisters. While recognizing the futility of courting close relationships with controlling and bombastic personalities, Barbara settled for the uncomplicated act of letting go. In so doing, she set the course for forgiveness, which has also trickled down into the next generations' dealings with each other.

Barbara's backbone and soft-heartedness are alive and well in her progeny, and I am proud to be one of them.

"She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy... Honor her for all that her hands have done, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate." Proverbs 31:20, 31


For more like this, check out: Morsels for Meditation...: Old Grudges

No comments: